Couples' Counseling

Tel: 212-414-5008

The first challenge in couples' counseling is how to transform the way the two of you relate to each other when there is conflict. My presence and intervention will help you tremendously in creating a forum where your friendship is restored and your relationship grows to include better conflict resolution.

Conflict in a close relationship is to be expected. Conflict is usually born out of the differences between the two parties, and the inter-dependency that a relationship imposes on individuals. Essentially, we know how to be an individual, but what is this third entity called "us" or "we"?

How do we make decisions and navigate our joint journey when each person within this unit has such different ideas, feelings, needs, opinions, personality and family history than the other?

People create a union, a union of love, a union of converging needs. When some unanticipated circumstances occur, conflicts arise. They feel "stuck" within that unit called a relationship. Each partner gets stuck in wanting to figure out who is wrong and who is better.

Common feelings that bring couples to counseling are: powerlessness, anger, frustrations, hurt, feeling unseen or misunderstood, feeling neglected, betrayed, cut off, emotionally exhausted, and numb. Often we repeat some patterns of an earlier primary relationship, and the dynamics of our parents' relationship come into play.

Initially, you can decide to come in for only 1-2 sessions. Sometimes, when both partners are already in therapy, that's all that is needed. Other times, it is best to enter a process of 6-8 months of couples' counseling.

Couples' counseling is not as scary as it seems. Its purpose is to provide a supportive environment

in which both partners can learn and grow.